For some, worrying uncontrollably can become a problem such as letting it take control of their lives. When we give control of our thoughts over to the mind, it can negatively impact our lives, jobs, relationships and even our health.
Humans are wired to worry. We cannot escape it. It helps us to survive, avoid harm or plan how to respond to a potential threat. In fact, worrying is the mind’s way of problem solving. We have been given the gift of imagination. With this gift, we have the ability to think of new ways to handle circumstances in our lives.
So you see, not all worrying is bad. While we may not be able to fully stop worrying, what we can do is understand why we do it and take control of how we chose to react to challenging situations.
So before we proceed, take a moment to take several deep breaths. Breathe deeply and hold your breath for about 10 seconds and then exhale as slowly as you can. Repeat this a few times.
The first thing we need to do is understand a few things about worry. There are two types of worrying: Productive and Non-Productive. There are situations we have control over and there are some we do not. Knowing the differences is crucial. So you need to ask yourself, is what you are worrying about productive and something you can solve?
The next thing we need to do is identify the need underneath the worry. You see, behind every worry is an unmet need. For example, when we feel threatened, we have a need to feel safe. Or perhaps when we see our bank account is low on cash, our immediate need might be financial stability or security. Once we identify the need, we gain a better understanding on how to address our concerns.
Once we discover that our worry is productive and have identified the unmet need, we are in a better position to tap into our intuition and imagination and find ways to solve our problem.
There are questions I usually ask myself when I am in a state of worry:
- What wants to happen? Are there any opportunities in the situation?
- Who are you going to be, one who takes charge or one who reacts?
- What steps will you take to resolve the situation?
So as you leave this page, I hope you walk away with a newer sense of relief that not all worrying is bad. We are wired to worry. Worry is the body’s way to solve problems.
It is up to us to take a step back, take a deep breath and identify the unmet need behind the worry. Using questions, like the ones mentioned in this post, you will be well on your way to solving the problems at hand.
If you would like to worry less and live more, I encourage you to contact me.